Wednesday, January 27, 2010
skinny wins
Me at 118 two weeks ago. My legs were still fat. It's my problem area. SO I feel perhaps once I get to 110, my legs will finally shrink, lets hope so! I am hopefully fasting all day today. I've had about 4 cups of coffee already and water and oops ginger ale but i was starving so i guess soda might be better than food. I'm getting more coffee and going to the library in 20 minutes. Making moves today and not eating! P.S. Ana and Mia bracelets coming soon...I noticed their is not a good resource to order any of them from. I think this is a new little business plan for me and I'll order the supplies and start making them soon. I will also post pictures. Ok so quote of the day : EVERY TIME I HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO EAT, I HAVE THE STRENGTH TO REFUSE.
stay strong x0
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Ana's Bitch...Something always brings me back to you & it never takes too long.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
118
how did this happen? i weigh 118?!!?! oh maybe the fact that I haven't barely eaten in 3 days and I'm doing so good. Now i decided I will do anything to be thin cause its my only way to happiness. I used to think love or something else could make me happy but now I understand thin is the way to feel good, the way to happiness. A lot of craziness has been going on this week and I mean insanity!! This blog may be the only thing to keep me sane! My ex boyfriend who has been MIA for 2 yrs came back into my life unexpectingly. I was shocked. He has been one of the major reasons why I decided to be ana. So I decided to go see him two nights ago. I didn't eat the days before since I wanted to look extra skinny. Then I saw him and I thought everything was going to be so different like maybe I could still love him. But no. I went there and I realize how much better I am then him, like now I really realize. Thank You ANA! He said I looked really skinny like I'm a drugs---hey i'll take it. then he made a comment that my legs are still fat. Damn that hurts. But they are. It's my chubby, thick thighs, thank you mother. So new plan and new goal of 110. Because 115 just won't do. I am happy I am at 118. I just ate though lettuce, avocado and 4 small meatballs. No carbs but its the first thing I've had in 3 days and a little bit of carbs since I think my mom puts whole wheat bread in the meatballs. Anyways I feel now that I decided to put my ex in the past with everything else, I just feel free. free to be happy and give all my time to ana. I love starving and feeling empty and focus on other more important things. I'll update more later for now I'm going to go finish up some work and get ready and prepared for what will hopefully be my last semester of college!! woot woot Stay Strong x0
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
hunger hurts & I want him so bad. oh it kills.
So I fell off. Binged all weekend on crap. Ate yesterday. Today I'm fasting and I'm not eating anything until I lose lets say 5 pounds. So when I'm 120. My new goal is still 115. Intake today: black coffee-5 cals. and drinking lemon water. no food today. none. lets go Stay Strong X0
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
So fragile we are, we just don't show it. So sexy we are we just don't know it.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
love it when you call me LEGS
i binged on bananas
LOL. I almost didn't eat after my coffee last night but I ended up binging on a banana, cheese on whole wheat and frosted flakes. o well. I just weighed myself and my sister is reading my weight first tells me I'm 122 but liess I'm 124 yay lost like 3 pounds. 9 more to go! I have been having seltzer, water and coffee and just had a handful of cashews, going for a coffee run and a run! STAY STRONG X0
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Ugh.
So I was trying to fast again today even though I cheated a little this morn, but I just ate dinner. FML
Intake today:
coffee-5 cals
egg whites-30
tablespoon of hummus and sun dried tomatoes (2)-60
banana
2 pieces of chicken
5 spoons of black beans
ok who knows how much that is. I just felt so weak not even hungry, but I'm should be under 500 cal for todays intake. Having coffee now and thats it.
Intake today:
coffee-5 cals
egg whites-30
tablespoon of hummus and sun dried tomatoes (2)-60
banana
2 pieces of chicken
5 spoons of black beans
ok who knows how much that is. I just felt so weak not even hungry, but I'm should be under 500 cal for todays intake. Having coffee now and thats it.
Hunger Hurts, Starving Works
Monday, January 4, 2010
Thank YOU ANA
So I pretty much fasted today. Thanks ANA
coffee/skim milk-15 cal
coffee-5 cal
gum- about 4 piece-15 cal
4 kosher dill pickles-0 cal
I took a laxative tea at around 12 am its now 2 :22am going to bed and hopefully will wake up to bowel movements hah gross but I need to get rid of all the shit I've been eating. I wonder if I can fast tom. all day too...lets see. STAY STRONG XO
Sunday, January 3, 2010
New Year New Me 2010
It's a new year. new goals. I forgot about Ana and my life went to hell seriously lost control of everything. I gained a couple pounds during finals and holidays. So I'm starting today only coffee and water. If I need to eat I can fake eat. I need to get back to the mentality that food makes me physically ill. GOAL: 120. lets go! stay strong X0
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